{"id":4282,"date":"2026-09-04T07:50:38","date_gmt":"2026-09-04T11:50:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/postureshift.com\/?p=4282"},"modified":"2026-09-05T11:50:14","modified_gmt":"2026-09-05T15:50:14","slug":"disowned-coming-out-disaster","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/postureshift.com\/es\/disowned-coming-out-disaster\/","title":{"rendered":"Disowned Then Devastated | A Coming Out Disaster"},"content":{"rendered":"
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We met Roshan five weeks ago as he desperately sought urgent assistance. He had just spent the prior two weeks with no shelter after being disowned by his family. At the end of Roshan\u2019s story, we will share more about Posture Shift\u2019s Justice Initiatives Fund. But first, here is Roshan sharing his story in his own words.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

Listen to the audio version.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>

COMING OUT<\/span><\/h2>

My name is Roshan. I am 18 years old and grew up in Nepal.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

I have always known that I am gay. For a long time, I carried this truth inside me because I was afraid of how people would react. I didn’t fully understand how much hatred and stigma existed toward gay people in my village. I thought my family would be the safest place for me.<\/span><\/p>

I eventually reached a point where I couldn’t continue hiding who I was. I didn’t want to live a lie or spend my entire life pretending to be someone else. I believed that if I told my family the truth about who I am, they would at least listen to me because they were my loving family.<\/span><\/p>

I thought home was the one place where I could be honest. <\/span>I was completely wrong.<\/b><\/p>

When I finally revealed that I was gay, the reaction was far more extreme than anything I had imagined. <\/span>The people I believed would protect me became the people I grew afraid of.<\/b><\/p>

I didn’t tell my family because I wanted to hurt or shame them. I told them because I desperately wanted to not be alone on the inside with just myself. And I wanted to be accepted for who I am.<\/span><\/p>

Instead, my life fell apart.<\/span><\/p>

MY FAMILY\u2019S REACTION<\/span><\/h2>

Upon saying the words \u201cI\u2019m gay,\u201d my father immediately kicked me out of the house.<\/span><\/p>

My elder brother became physically violent toward me. He slapped me so hard that I was terrified. He threatened me, in words I will never forget; \u201cIf you want to live, you better run for your life!\u201d He said that if I don\u2019t renounce being gay, that he would \u201ctake the gay\u201d out of me.<\/span><\/p>

My mother shattered my heart when she told everyone: \u201cThere is no son named Roshan in our family anymore!\u201d She told me I was nobody to them and that, as far as they were concerned, I was dead.<\/span><\/p>

I cannot explain what it feels like to hear your own mother tell you that you are dead to her while you are standing right in front of her.<\/span><\/p>

I had gone to my family hoping for love. Instead, I was told that I was nobody.<\/span><\/p>

My elder brother also exposed me to people in the village. After that, the situation became even worse. People began mocking me, humiliating me, and treating me as though I was disgusting.<\/span><\/p>

I could no longer walk around normally without being afraid of being attacked. The situation became so dangerous that someone even talked about involving the police.<\/span><\/p>

The place that had once been my home no longer felt like a home at all.<\/span><\/p>

Suddenly, home felt like a place I needed to escape from to survive.<\/span><\/p>

HORRIBLE THINGS SAID<\/span><\/h2>

The words directed at me were extremely cruel. I was told things like, \u201cWe will kill you.\u201d That I was nobody and that nobody wanted me. That I was a disgrace, an unwanted branch of the family, and a worthless person. I was also called a degrading name that means retarded.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

Those words stayed in my head. And that hurts deeply. But the physical violence and threats made the situation much more serious than simply verbal abuse. I began genuinely fearing that my family or someone else in the community might seriously hurt or kill me.<\/span><\/p>

In an instant realization of imminent danger, all my hope that things might improve melted away. I suddenly knew that every moment I remained in my village was like taking a risk with my life. I felt a deep fear rise up in me: they are going to kill me.<\/span><\/p>

I had to run. And I did. I ran for my very life!<\/b><\/p>

I wasn’t running away because I wanted a different life. I wasn\u2019t running away from the family I had always loved. <\/span>I was running because I was afraid I might not survive if I stayed.<\/b><\/p>

I ran to live.<\/b><\/p>

\"young<\/p>

WITHOUT A HOME<\/span><\/h2>

After I was thrown out, I had nowhere to go. For about two weeks, I slept on streets and in abandoned places. I had no change of clothes. I had no shower.\u00a0 I had almost nothing with me.<\/span><\/p>

I barely ate. There were times when I had to search through rubbish because I was so hungry and had no money for food. I went from a loving home smiling as my mother cooked, to starving in the streets and eating food waste.<\/span><\/p>

I was attempting to survive from one moment to the next.<\/span><\/p>

The first night of homelessness was never something I thought I would ever face. It was so hard. And I was so afraid. I didn’t know where I would sleep that night. I didn’t know where my next meal would come from. And I definitely didn’t know who I could trust.<\/span><\/p>

Eventually, I had no choice. Being so hungry, I began begging on the streets. I would ask people for whatever small amount they were willing to give me. I collected a few coins at a time. Those few coins helped me survive while I sought help. <\/span>But who would really help me?<\/b><\/p>

ESCAPING NEPAL<\/span><\/h2>

I knew I had to get out of Nepal. But I could not make it happen. I was far enough from home to be safe, but I was living on the streets with no shelter or protection.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

I looked online for any help available to LGBT+ people in my situation. I immediately found Posture Shift and asked for help to get somewhere safe. To be honest, I did not expect a reply and I could not wait long.<\/span><\/p>

I realized that I had to immediately leave Nepal and go to India. I believed it was my best chance of getting away from the immediate danger. I crossed into India hoping that I could finally leave the darkest part of my life behind. But leaving Nepal did not immediately mean that I was safe. I arrived in India still homeless and vulnerable, with almost nothing.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

HOMELESS AND AFRAID<\/span><\/h2>

Being homeless was terrifying because I quickly learned that there are people who will take advantage of someone who has nowhere to go. I met many different people while I was living on the streets and moving from place to place. Some appeared to offer help, but their intentions were not always good.<\/span><\/p>

I encountered people who tried to sexually exploit me. Some wanted sex in exchange for accommodation or assistance. Others simply saw that I was young, alone, homeless, and vulnerable and believed they could do whatever they wanted to me.<\/span><\/p>

One time, I was so hungry and a guy gave me food. I ate a little and suddenly became sleepy. I immediately threw the food away and tried to overcome drowsiness by running as fast as I could.<\/span><\/p>

To be homeless is to always be in motion. I had to constantly move because I could never know who was safe. The anxiety and fear were exhausting and never-ending.<\/span><\/p>

There was one night that I will never forget.<\/span><\/p>

A man who initially offered me a safe place to sleep quickly became a different person. He tried to sexually assault me while I was sleeping. I realized what was happening and immediately ran away from the place.<\/span><\/p>

I was terrified.<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

I didn’t know where to go, but I knew I had to get away. Once more, I ran for my life. That pretty much captures homelessness: constantly on the run from risks and dangers all around me.<\/span><\/p>

That experience made me understand how vulnerable I was. When you are young, homeless, alone, and have no protection, there are people who will try to exploit you because they believe you have no one to defend you. And they are right: <\/span>there was absolutely no one to protect me.<\/b><\/p>

There were many people who approached me sexually, and I was constantly afraid that someone would rape me or seriously hurt me. I couldn’t simply relax and sleep. Even finding somewhere to close my eyes for the night could be extremely dangerous.<\/span><\/p>

I was constantly moving, constantly watching who was around me, and constantly wondering whether the next person offering help actually wanted to help me.<\/span><\/p>

These were by far the darkest days of my life.<\/span><\/p>

MY MOST DESPERATE MOMENT<\/span><\/h2>

Everything about being homeless was frightening and exhausting. But the worst and most desperate moment for me was realizing that there was nowhere I could call home.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

All my life, I had a home. I had a loving family. I played football. I lived in beautiful mountains with incredible valley views. I enjoyed school and helping my family at home.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

But all of my security disappeared in a flash. My entire life vanished before my eyes.<\/span><\/p>

Nepal, my beautiful home country and all I had ever known, was no longer safe for me. My family had rejected me. My village knew about me. Everyone was threatening me. I was homeless. I had almost no money. I had very little food. And getting help was always risky.<\/span><\/p>

I remember feeling like my entire life had been reduced to survival. I was no longer thinking about a career or going to university or even any dreams about my future. I was thinking about where I would sleep at night and whether I would wake up safe and alive the next morning.<\/span><\/p>

There were moments when I wondered whether my life would ever become normal again.<\/span><\/p>

I felt completely alone.<\/b><\/p>

PRAYING TO GOD<\/span><\/h2>

During those moments, my prayers became very simple.<\/span><\/p>

\u201cGod, please don’t let me die.\u201d<\/span><\/p>

\u201cGod, please protect me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>

\u201cPlease give me somewhere safe to sleep.\u201d<\/span><\/p>

\u201cPlease send someone to help me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>

\u201cPlease give me the strength to keep going.\u201d<\/span><\/p>

Sometimes I couldn’t pray properly at all. I was exhausted, hungry, frightened, and emotionally broken. I didn\u2019t understand why I was going through this. I didn\u2019t understand why telling my family the truth had resulted in me losing my entire life.<\/span><\/p>

But even when I couldn’t find the words, I still tried to hold onto God. And as strange as it may sound, somewhere inside me,<\/span> I continued to believe that my life still had value<\/b>. I was hopeless but a prevailing hope in God\u2019s goodness remained in my heart throughout this experience.<\/span><\/p>

CONNECTING WITH POSTURE SHIFT<\/span><\/h2>

When I finally connected with the Posture Shift Team, something changed. They didn’t treat me like I was a problem. They didn’t tell me that I needed to become someone else. They listened.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

The entire Posture Shift Team believed that my safety mattered.<\/span><\/p>

They promised to quickly advance assistance to help get me off the streets and into a clean and safe hostel. After all that I had been through, merely hearing those words meant everything to me. It was a miracle!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

I was like a man lost in the desert who finally realizes the water is no longer just a mirage!<\/b><\/p>

I had spent two weeks with no shelter wondering if anyone cared whether I lived or died. Then suddenly, the Posture Shift Team was urgently trying to get me somewhere safe.<\/span><\/p>

Over the following weeks, Posture Shift helped me travel to a safer city and find a Christian hostel. This may seem so simple to everyone else, but what was most comforting to me that first night in the hostel is that<\/span> I had a door I could close at night<\/b>. Closing that door allowed me to feel safe and release so much fear and anxiety that I had been constantly carrying for weeks.<\/span><\/p>

I had a bed. I had food. Delicious food. Fresh food.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

I had new friends at Posture Shift who I trusted. And it felt so secure that they knew where I was. I had friends in America who believed in Jesus, who knew everything about me, and they did not reject me in the most desperate season of my life.<\/span><\/p>

I could finally sleep without wondering whether someone would attack me. Thank God!<\/b><\/p>

ALL IN A MONTH<\/span><\/h2>

The biggest change in my life today is that I am no longer simply surviving. I am beginning to live. I am now in a safe Christian hostel and enrolled in university, where I will study engineering.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

Posture Shift not only had a vision to offer me rescue and refuge. They are giving me an entire future. I know that God has done all of this in His great love for me. He heard the cries in my heart!<\/span><\/p>

Sometimes I look at my life now and think about the person who was sleeping on the streets, begging for coins and trying to escape all those threatening people.<\/span><\/p>

It feels like two different lives. It feels like I have a new life!\u00a0<\/b><\/p>

I went from being told by my own family that I was nobody to having people who remind me every day that my life has value. I went from having nowhere to sleep to having a safe Christian home with delicious meals. I went from being afraid of tomorrow to preparing for a future.<\/span><\/p>

I am going to be an engineer, and I believe God will continue to give me a blessed life.<\/span><\/p>

I still carry the trauma of what happened. I am still healing. Some memories are very painful.<\/span><\/p>

But I have hope now.<\/b><\/p>

And I believe God protected me when I was at my weakest. I believe He gave me the strength to run when I needed to run, the courage to keep going when I wanted to give up, and the right people at the right time when I had nowhere else to turn.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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THE NEPALI FLASH FLOODS<\/span><\/h2>

When the flash flood ravished Nepal, bringing unprecedented devastation, I feared that my family might be dead. But I was too afraid to contact them. Could the phone call reveal my location? The fact is, I already tried reaching out to them when I was homeless and they would not reply.<\/span><\/p>

Bill Henson, Posture Shift\u2019s President, offered to reach out to my father to see how my family is doing. I thought my father might not even speak to Bill. Or even say horrible things about me.<\/span><\/p>

I am still processing in amazement what happened. My father immediately asked Bill, <\/span>\u201cIs my son Roshan okay?\u201d<\/b> They had no idea where I had fled, so my father thought I might have been washed away in the great flash floods.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

I want to share what else my father wrote to Bill. It means everything to me.<\/span><\/p>

\u201cRoshan, if you are reading this message, we want to tell you that we love you and miss you very much. What we did to you was wrong, and we sincerely apologize for the pain and suffering it has caused you. The devastating floods left us with no home, our last savings gone, and even a member of our family lost. This difficult situation has made us realize how precious life is and how important it is to love and respect our family. It has forced us to think deeply about our past behavior and the injustices we have done to you. We are truly sorry for the hurt we have caused you. We hope you are safe, happy, and doing well in your studies. We love you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>

After being told that I was dead to my family, I never imagined ever hearing words of love from my father. I don’t know what will happen with my family in the future, but I pray that this can be the beginning of healing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>

Even before reading my father\u2019s reply, there was never a point in this entire journey when I did not feel deep love for my family. <\/span>I forgave them the day I fled for my life<\/b>. How could I ever stop loving my family? I will always love them. I wept when the floods hit, fearing the worst. I have prayed and prayed that they are safe and can recover.<\/span><\/p>

Posture Shift is helping me with my engineering tuition, housing, meals, medical, and other living expenses. And today, I learned that Posture Shift will help my parents recover by contributing to the cost of them rebuilding a home.<\/span><\/p>

Without my prayers and God\u2019s goodness, I might never have connected with Posture Shift. I never imagined that disaster would strike my family and wash away our family home. I never imagined that I would have a path to get an engineering degree. God\u2019s work in rescuing me has led to Posture Shift also helping to rescue my family. I think God is amazing!<\/span><\/p>

WHAT I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW<\/span><\/h2>

I hope that God will use my suffering for everything good. I pray that what I went through will prevent another teenager from having to suffer from family rejection. I especially hope that parents will understand one thing:<\/span><\/p>

When a child tells you that they are gay, they are not asking to be rejected. They are trusting you with a deeply vulnerable part of who they are. They are not asking for you to agree. They are needing you to love them even if you don\u2019t agree.<\/span><\/p>

That\u2019s all. Love your LGBT+ child.<\/b><\/p>

I told my family because I believed they were the safest people in the world. Instead, I lost my home. I lost my family. I became homeless. I was exposed to violence and sexual exploitation. And I came frighteningly close to losing hope and my very life.<\/span><\/p>

I don’t want another young person to suffer through what I experienced.<\/b><\/p>

If my story can help even one parent choose love over rejection, or help one young person who is suffering understand that their life still has value, then perhaps some good can come from my pain. And just to say, if you do need help, reach out to Posture Shift. They will love you.<\/span><\/p>

Today, I am still here.<\/span><\/p>

I am safe.<\/span><\/p>

I am studying.<\/span><\/p>

I am rebuilding.<\/span><\/p>

And I am beginning to believe in my future again.<\/span><\/p>

For that, I thank God first, and I am deeply grateful to the Posture Shift team, and everyone in the Posture Shift Prayer Team who has prayed for me and stood beside me. For every LGBT+ person that Posture Shift assists, we each get placed in our private WhatsApp group chat with the entire Posture Shift Team. They are a big support to me every day. They are like family.<\/span><\/p>

Please continue to pray for my safety, my studies, my healing, my future, and my family.<\/span><\/p>

I don’t know exactly where this journey will take me, but for the first time, I believe I have a future worth fighting for. Thank you for listening to my story. Please help Posture Shift help my family recover from the loss of our family home. Thank you for your help.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Posture Shift<\/a> maintains a Justice Initiatives Fund to assist marginalized LGBT+ people in persecuting nations. Family rejection is rising in developing nations. Some families even issue honor killing awards for the execution of their LGBT+ children. <\/span><\/p>

We currently assist 28 young adults with financial, emotional, and spiritual support. This includes fully paying college tuition and housing for 7 teenagers from 5 nations all of whom have been disowned and threatened with death. Our cost to assist each young adult runs $10,000 USD per year.<\/span><\/p>

By giving to Posture Shift\u2019s Justice Initiatives Fund<\/a>, you join our team as we partner together to meet this rising need of LGBT+ teens being disowned and left homeless. Lives are saved! <\/span><\/p>

And lives are rebuilt, just as Roshan\u2019s life is being rebuilt. We invite you to partner with Posture Shift. Together, we help Roshan and dozens of other LGBT+ young adults.<\/span><\/p>

Roshan’s family has lost everything. We seek to give them a sizable gift to help them replace their home. We need partners to help. Please join our efforts today.<\/span><\/p>

We are seeking one-time gifts of $500 to $50,000 and monthly gifts of $50 to $500. Thank you in advance for partnering with Posture Shift.\u00a0 \u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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We met Roshan five weeks ago as he desperately sought urgent assistance. He had just spent the prior two weeks with no shelter after being disowned by his family. At the end of Roshan\u2019s story, we will share more about Posture Shift\u2019s Justice Initiatives Fund. But first, here is Roshan sharing his story in his […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":4366,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,15,29,46,11],"tags":[45,23,47,24,48,49,37,39,41],"class_list":["post-4282","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-for-parents","category-justice-initiatives","category-key-events","category-lgbt-inclusion","category-posture-shift","tag-community","tag-gay-christians","tag-justice-initiatives-fund","tag-lgbt-identity","tag-nepal","tag-nepal-floods","tag-posture-shift","tag-safe-families","tag-unconditional-love"],"acf":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t